Nobantu Shabangu

Yesterday a double rainbow appeared across the sky after the rains. The city looked magical as some buildings were showered with the tiny beads of colour. The sky was cloudy and golden, and my heart was so happy.
It is a new year and even though I didn’t enter it so well I hope it will be a good one, one of breakthroughs and progression. Last year was hard because I lost my father so early in the year and a few months ago my grandmother got sick and has been in the hospital ever since. My relationships were broken and I am not sure were or with whom the fault lies in this regard; all I know is that I plan to mend those that deserve mending. I hope to make new friends and hopefully date someone who will love me as much as I will love them because it is painful to love and not to be loved in return.
Right now the city has clear blue skies and is quieter than most times. I can hear the birds which is unusual because usually the sound of people selling stuff and cars banging their hooters fill the sky. I have to be at work within an hour and I am dreading it. I cannot wait until I can take leave but when I do take it I hope to go somewhere far from the city, that means I have to save money, money I do not have.
My mind switches from states of nervousness to calmness. There is a lot of shit on my mind and I know writing should help me filter it out and soothe me but today I am unsettled, restless and listless. God help me.